Dazed (Blueberry pancakes)

Awsten Knight/Otto Wood, Explicit

Post highschool Otto and Awsten meeting, this fic includes: Trans Awsten Knight; Bottom Awsten Knight; Safe Sex; Crossdressing; They raw-dog in chapter two

Chapter 1

Otto was not prepared for this. Not even remotely.

Not for the guy grinding down on him, not for the shitty music playing, not for the fact his band members had driven off without him.

But he wasn’t thinking about that right now, not when there was a pretty boy desperately pressing close into Otto’s space, practically begging for more.

No, he was pretty focused on the here and the now.

“Awsten! Get a fucking room, Jesus! You always do this!” Another guy, this one with mid-length red dyed hair was pulling the pretty one off of Otto’s lap.

He was a little dazed but he followed who he guessed must be Awsten up the stairs and out of the basement show. He was pulled into the closest bedroom on that floor. Awsten knew where he was going.

“Shit. Dude what are you-” Otto says, staring at Awsten, who had managed to get his shirt off and was already working on his skinny jeans.

“Did you wanna fuck or not? ‘Cause I’m, like, so desperate, I haven’t had any in weeks and you're crazy hot so you should either be taking your pants off or leaving.” That was all he got as an explanation.

Otto dumbly tugged his jeans off and Awsten pulled him into a kiss, fervor evident with how he was pulling on Otto’s hips to bring him closer.

He got his boxers off and the two of them awkwardly stumbled onto the bed, falling over each other onto the unmade sheets.

Awsten has rolled back over to be on top of him, his slim thighs hugging Otto’s as he leans back against the million pillows between him and the headboard. He doesn’t know what to do with his hands at that moment.

They end up falling to Awsten’s waist, thumbs brushing the bare skin. He can still hear the music from downstairs, but it’s a different shitty local band now. More metal-ish than the usual punk-ish.

Awsten takes his mind off of the drum solo pretty fucking quickly when he lets out a soft sound and reaches down to his not dick.

Huh. Well, this is a development. Not really a bad one, but it makes Otto’s job a little easier.

“Jesus Christ all-fucking-mighty can you please just fuck me? Like seriously, I’m so pent up we were making out for like half an hour before you started to get the hint and-”

“Yeah. Yeah hold on, where’s a condom?” Otto whispers out, voice a little hoarse. Awsten grins at him and reaches over to the nightstand. This must be Awsten’s room if he keeps fucking lube in here, right? Maybe Otto isn’t being as much of a dick as he thought he was, so long as this isn’t some random dude's room.

The condom is retrieved and Otto rolls it down his dick. Awsten in the meantime has gotten a little bit of lube out of the bottle and is lightly slicking himself up.

“Sorry I- it makes it better for me. Give me a second, just- just a second to-” He looks awkward now, a little self-conscious, “And, I, yeah, I look like a guy- I am ok. So. Just, this isn’t- don’t worry about it, yeah?”

“I couldn't care less as long as you sit on my dick.”

“Great, ok, ok, let’s go then,” Awsten replies, anxieties evaporating. Then, his hand is in the mix with Otto’s and he’s moving Otto’s fingers out of the way to handle the lining up part of this procedure himself.

Awsten lets out a breath as he sinks down. One of his hands is braced on Otto’s chest as he moves and both of Otto’s are holding Awsten’s hips to steady him.

Otto can barely fucking think by the time Awsten starts moving. His nerves are firing off in little rhythms at the rocking back and forth.


Awsten had felt wound the fuck up for a week now. It’d been too long since he’d gotten fucked and longer still since he’d gotten fucked well. He went to Jawn’s party knowing damn well if he didn’t find someone to his taste soon he was just gonna give in and buy a vibrator.

But then, at the back of the venue, a guy who’d just finished a fantastic drumming set for a not-so-fantastic band caught his eye. Long, curly hair, and a solid stature, and he was mingling a little awkwardly with people, just enough so it was obvious he wasn’t looking to get laid but probably wouldn’t mind that happening.

So Awsten laid down his legendary moves and annoyed the hell out of him with questions and impromptu physical contact until he finally asked to just kiss already. And they did.

And now Awsten is riding him in the guest bedroom of Jawn’s house, the one that’s practically his considering how much time he spends in it.

Otto’s not bad, all things considered. He’s not super active, maybe, but Awsten’s fine with that. He looks a little starstruck but he’s a good kisser and his hands are sturdy on his hips so he doesn’t mind. He twists his hips up fucking beautifully every once in a while, rocking into Awsten as he grinds up and down.

It knocks his breath away and he’s damn fucking glad this dude’s dick is the right size to reach his sweet spot. Bonus points for not throwing a fit over Awsten’s obvious preference for grinding into that instead of more usual movements.

It’s easier than having the guy try to swear that he can find the clit when that wouldn’t be super helpful in Awsten’s case anyways. God did not bless him in that department, but at least this time around he’s seriously feeling it.

His body feels wound tight and his low back is pressing forward into an arch, searching for the perfect moment and the right spot, his brain feels like it's melting away, it’s leaving behind everything in that search for explosive warmth and-

There it is. He lets go, grinds down into his sweet spot through it, and lets his muscles twitch and tighten of their own accord. Fuck. Yes.

He can feel the man under him tighten his grip on his hips, holding him still for a moment as his own orgasm passes.

Awsten feels boneless. His muscles unwind along with the thoughts that keep him awake. God, he fucking loves it when he gets off this well. He’s going to sleep well tonight, something he hasn’t had for months.

“Uh- do you- can I like-” The guy is stuttering. He’s pulled out and thrown out the condom already, but now he just looks flushed and tired.

“Mm. Help me up.” He reaches a hand towards Otto and leans his shaking body against one that’s a little more put together.

One trip to the bathroom later and he pulls Otto back into bed with him. Awsten needs the closeness right now and he seems to be on the same page at least.

He falls asleep curled up in Otto’s arms, warm from the inside out.


Jawn is tired of Awsten crashing at his house every time he fucks a dude. Seriously, it’s getting exhausting.

Awsten walks out of the guest room yawning. He’s in a shirt that definitely isn’t his but at least his boxers are for once.

“Your hair looks like shit,” Jawn comments as he raids the last of the coffee right out of the pot.

“Shut the fuck up,” He mutters back.

“Did you sleep well at least? Was it good?”

“Yeah. Dude it was so fucking good. Slept like a goddamn rock. Hey, can I make breakfast?”

“That’s fine, as long as you make enough for everyone,” Jawn replies.

“God, you sound like a fucking school teacher, stop that shit, it’s weird.”

“Nah, I don’t think I will.” Awsten just stuck his tongue out at him momentarily before pulling out the pancake mix from the cupboard.


A week is about the longest Jawn had ever seen Awsten stick with someone, until Otto. They’d been friends, boyfriends, and everything in between over the last five months but they never seemed to tire of it. Nothing could break the two of them apart, no matter how hard anyone tried.

They were a pair of troublemakers with a penchant for using Jawn’s kitchen to make blueberry pancakes.

Chapter 2

The window is open, and it’s driving Awsten crazy. The birds outside are chirping incessantly, and he can hear the god-awful noises of a garbage truck screeching down the street. Otto is nowhere to be found, but Awsten really does not have the energy to get up and close the window.

So instead, he just forces himself to relax. He stretches, lets his joints pop, and moves the blankets so they aren’t bunched. He does everything in his power to avoid leaving the comfort of his boyfriend’s bed.

Otto doesn’t show up until ten minutes later, when Awsten is already half asleep again. At least his reawakening is met with the only good way to wake up: breakfast.

Otto is holding a tray with the most cliche breakfast spread imaginable. Pancakes, bacon, eggs, a few slices of fruit, and a cup of coffee. He obviously put far too much thought into it, considering Otto doesn’t really drink coffee, at least not like Awsten does.

"It’s our anniversary," is all Awsten is given in the way of an explanation. He didn’t entirely forget; he had a present for Otto waiting in his car, but the weekend morning had dismissed it entirely from his thoughts.

It’s a good morning, to say the least.


Awsten kicks Otto out of his own house after dinner. He makes him go out to the movies with Geoff while he sets up his own surprise.

It’s just as full of cliches as Otto’s was, but that was just their brand of annoying couple bullshit. It worked for them more than it would for most. Most people wouldn’t appreciate it. They’d want something more unique or thoughtful.

But for him and Otto, this was more thoughtful. It was a joke, mostly. It was something they could laugh about and tease, and their personalities always shined through in boring circumstances. So Awsten made sure this would be fun. For Otto and for himself.

He had bought a dress. They weren’t something he would have ever really considered wearing before he met Otto. They were something he had fought hard against being made to wear his entire life.

But Otto was unquestioning of him, and that gave Awsten more freedom in a lot of ways. He didn’t have to be a girl to know Otto found him attractive, but he didn’t have to be a boy either.

That kind of made all the difference to him.

So he bought a dress. It was on a whim, really. He’d been at the mall to pick up Geoff from whatever job he’d had that week, and he’d just walked into Victoria’s Secret and bought a dress.

It had been surprisingly easy for something that had been built up in his mind as an impossible task for his entire life. It just caught his eye, and he thought, "Otto would love how I would look in this." So he bought it. Easy as pie.

And it did look good on him. It was lavender, just his size, silk, and high quality. The back was mostly straps, and it hung off of him in a way that made him seem smaller than he was, in the best way possible.

Awsten set up candles around the room. A few were scented sweetly, but most were just plain. He even snuck a few Jesus candles in just for effect. He sprinkled rose petals up the stairs and down the hallway and made the bed with the softest sheets he could find.

It was perfect. Finally, he got himself ready.

He slid the dress on and smoothed the silky material down his thighs, appreciating the soothing feeling on his freshly shaved legs. He shaved all over for tonight. Not exactly his usual routine, to say the least.

The thin straps hug his back, criss-crossing all the way down his shoulder blades, and the skirt is just short enough to show off the curve of his ass. It’s not tight, but it still pulls at his figure and gives it more definition than he would have otherwise.

He even bothers to put on makeup. Not much, but a little mascara and some lipstick go a long way to bring everything together.

More than anything, Awsten just feels like he’s in drag. And it’s fucking hot, is what it is.

If this were another night, he would tie himself up or be planning out a scene in his head. This isn’t one of those nights, though; this is for stupid, sweet, lovey-dovey couple sex. Awsten fingers himself slowly and lazily while he waits. Geoff texted him that they just got done with the movie five minutes ago.

His mind is drifting as he works himself up. It’s always better this way, when he can get himself ready. It’s not like Otto is bad at it—far from it—but Awsten has just always liked doing it himself a little better.

As soon as he hears the door open, he pulls his hand away. He situates himself in a slutty pin-up girl pose, settled on his side with one arm laid across his hip in a sultry gesture towards his cunt.

Fuck, he’s so wet right now. His mind is racing, which is stupid considering how many times he and Otto have done this.

Well, not exactly.

"Hey, Awsten. So this was your plan?" Otto asks, leaning on the doorway. His eyes are traveling up and down Awsten’s body, his pupils wide and dark. The candlelight is hitting him in such a way that he looks almost ethereal.

"Mhm. That it is. I’ve got another surprise for you, though. Care to guess, pretty boy?" He lets his voice slip into a soft, low tone while he speaks.

"Nah. I’d rather you just tell me before I get too impatient to wait, darling."

"Fine. I’m on birth control. I got tested. I know you’re clean. Wanna guess what your real present is now?"

"Oh. Oh, fuck, Awsten really?" Otto’s eyes have gone wide, but he’s finally stepping past the door and shutting it behind him without looking. Within just a few steps, he’s standing right in front of Awsten and staring him down.

"Don’t sound so disappointed, asshole," Awsten replies with as much snark as he can muster in the moment. It turns out being turned on makes sarcasm a little harder to manage, though he would never admit that to anyone.

"Oh, honey, I am anything but disappointed," Otto whispers back, finally settling onto the bed. His arm snakes around Awsten’s waist and pulls him in close until their lips meet. It’s gentle—much gentler than usual.

And they take it slow like that for a while, just making out and holding close. Eventually, Otto’s hand stops tracing circles into Awsten’s thigh and finally moves up, dipping against him where he’s most sensitive.

It doesn’t feel like all that much to him, just delicate and good. He feels delicate right now in a way he very rarely does. Otto goes down on him, and he feels nice against him. It’s nothing groundbreaking.

It makes him finally properly relax, though, and makes him lose the anxious buzz that had made him worry if Otto would actually want this. He opens him well and then comes back around to kiss him stupid and all of the nerves are gone.

It feels like a first time, but better. It has newness without any faltering or confusion. It’s just right.

Otto pushes in, and he moves slowly, carefully, and deeply. They keep kissing, and it’s getting somewhere in Awsten’s chest to be treated like this. Usually, he avoids it at all costs. Usually, he either wants it rough or not at all.

But here, there aren’t any degrading names or fast, harsh movements.

It’s just him and Otto, and he’s never felt safer. He almost hates it as much as he adores it. If this was his sex life all the time, he would go insane, but for now it’s fine. It’s amazing, actually.

He doesn’t cum with Otto, but he’s fine with that. He wasn’t looking for that this time around. He got what he wanted, which was just closeness with the man he loves. He doesn’t love the feeling of cum dripping out of him, but it’s not anywhere near bad either.

Otto eats him out again afterwards until he orgasms. It’s not the most powerful, but it’s nice. It makes his muscles loosen and his mind quiet. Otto disappears for a few moments, and when he returns, he carefully washes Awsten down with a cloth.

Then they sleep, curled up around each other just like the first time they were ever together.